"if you see something, say something"

Dammit bystander effect! Making me reflect on things and dislike myself! I am in fact guilty of being a bystander. Growing up, other kids used to make fun of my neighbor/good family friend and it wasn't until i got older and matured that i was able to stand up for him and tell people to shut up. It was really upsetting to hear people make fun of him and it used to frustrate me because even though he isn't the coolest person around, he's a really quality person and those are my favorite! I get mad at myself for this but no matter how much of a leader you try to be, there's always an incident in which you're a follower.

Truthfully, it took me a while to think about a time that i had been a bystander. Not because i think i am perfect and would never do anything that i am not proud of but because such things make me feel guilty. i tend to dwell on things that bother me (in this case the shame of being a bystander rather than being productive) and just sit around and stress. Of course this is not enjoyable so i worked to repress these thoughts so it took me a while to call up these memories.

The best way to not have to be stressed or experience dislike for myself, would be to never do anything that would lead to me being disappointed with my own actions. Why do nothing and feel terrible about yourself after the incident than stand up and feel good about yourself in the moment and afterwards? i have been making an effort to do things that are good that also make me feel good rather than bad after the fact. For example, some homeless people asked me for a sandwich the other day and i went and bought them some food. did they appreciate it? No apparently they wanted something else! but still, it felt good to do something even if it wasn't appreciate because i myself felt good. And that is the different between watching something unfold and just letting it go compared to putting a stop to something while it is happening; the difference being feeling good about yourself instead of shying away because you're embarrassed to speak your piece and lamenting about it later. #changingtheworld1sandwich@atime <-- why do i always feel the need to hashtag, i barely twitter

In terms of the greek community, bystander effect really comes into play when alcohol and other things that could potentially make a situation go extremely wrong are present. It's that whole "if you see something, say something" thing that you are always being prodded to do in airports and on trains and subways. I usually make fun of the marquees that say that because they're annoying and so slogany but thinking about it, it'd be a great logo for the bystander effect! if you see someone drinking too much, do not just stand there and laugh, do something about it! and even worse if you see someone making a fool of themselves don't point at them and laugh and draw attention (which i always do!!!! dammit nicole!) because that's also being an enabler. When they are throwing up later they will not think that your ten minute stint of laughing and drawing attention to them was quite so funny. sitting here typing about how other people should not be bystanders makes me realize i should not be a bystander. sorry for my hypocrisy, ill work on it!